I hate New Year’s resolutions. Mostly because I’m terrible at keeping myself accountable and break them by mid-afternoon of January 1st…but I made one last year, regardless. I told myself that I was going to continue my healthy eating streak of 2011 and get back to my sexy high school dancer body. I gained about 20+ pounds instead. See? I don’t keep myself accountable. I also detest grocery shopping and eat a lot of fast food…
Despite that, however, 2012 was a pretty decent year. Yes, it had its terrible, grief-stricken moments, but it also had its amazing moments as well. So I’m taking a look back at everything that went down in the last 365 days of my life. And because I can hardly remember what I did yesterday, I’m using my Facebook statuses to look back and share the memories with you (thank you, Timeline, you’ve finally come in handy!) So without further a do, I present to you my greatest hits of 2012: the good, the bad, and the f@&#ing hilarious…with director’s commentary.
January 8th: making Bobby Deen's guiltless mac and cheese for dinner...I can smell it baking in the oven and my mouth is watering!
This is when I was on my healthy eating spree and watching a lot of Rachael Ray. There was a reason that mac and cheese was “guiltless.” You’d have to be dumb or dead to want to eat it.
January 9th: "Being a great artist is like being a great lacrosse player...no one really cares." - My drawing instructor
I failed to mention that this was said after I was ridiculed in front of the entire class and told that drawing just wasn’t my thing. I believe it was supposed to cheer me up. I just thought my instructor looked more like an asshole.
January 18th: I'm going to need a heavy dose of Ritalin to make it through drawing class this semester...how do people just stare at one thing for hours on end???
If the last status didn't give you an indication of what the next sixteen weeks of my life looked like, this one just did.
January 24th: just had my first minor kitchen fire, and hopefully it's my last.
Yes, I put water on a grease fire. Yes, I tried to remedy it with a roll of paper towels and an oven mitt.
February 5th: and today I discover The Big Bang Theory, so excuse me while I don't leave my television for the next week...
And it has been true love ever since.
February 8th: “I stand for honesty, equality, kindness, compassion, treating people the way you’d want to be treated and helping those in need. To me, those are traditional values. That’s what I stand for." - Ellen DeGeneres
February 21st: as the self-professed most organized person in the world, it is a real blow to the ego when I lose something.
Read the overly dramatic tale that sparked this status here.
February 22nd: you know it is time to do your laundry when you've spent the last two weeks rationing your socks.
Rationing your socks in the dead of winter is no joke.
February 24th: at the mall doing some people watching...does the fact that this is for an assignment make it any less creepy?
No, no it does not.
March 6th: My parents went to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter without me. They are nearly forgiven.
March 8th: IU restrooms have got to have the most intellectually stimulating graffiti I have ever seen. Where else will you find entire stalls dedicated to debating life, love, and the apocalypse?
I assume this is only the women’s restroom, though. I’d put money on the fact that men’s restrooms only have one topic of graffiti, and it definitely isn’t philosophy.
March 9th: one messed up Pizza X order resulted in two pizzas, two bags of breadsticks, and a $15 gift certificate...I made out like a bandit in that deal.
It’s the small things in life, ya know?
March 21st: I'm having one of those brain dead days where 2+2=5 and I'm not sure if "muffin" is real word or if I made it up.
March 22nd: Homework should never be done inside when there is scenery like this to enjoy ♥
March 28th: sometimes I wonder what the pest control people think when they come into my apartment and see spiders or wasps trapped under a glass just waiting to die, I mean, they obviously don't dispose of them as is their job.
I once had a wasp living under a Tupperware bowl in the middle of my living room for two weeks before it died. True story.
April 4th: to everyone braving the torrential downpour and floods, don't worry, Bloomington radio predicts there is only a 40% chance of rain.
I wonder if the meteorologist squeezed their boobs á la Karen from Mean Girls in order to come up with that forecast.
April 13th: Woke up to a new day, but still trapped between a state of shock and mourning. The world lost a great man last night, but I know he is at peace and with Nana once more. He left behind stories, advice, and memories that we will all cherish (or fondly laugh at) forever. RIP Dodo ♥
April 15th: This is where I posted a link to my grandfather’s obituary. The last line read, “In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to your local animal shelter in his memory,” which warms my heart since my Dodo truly loved his four-legged friends. He didn’t have a dog himself, but he always carried treats in his pockets to hand out to the neighborhood canines during his daily walks.
April 20th: a big thank you to the Indiana State Police, VFW Post 717, the Lake Station American Legion Patriot Guard and Honor Guard for sending my Dodo off in style. I'm so proud to be the granddaughter of a war veteran.
I know my Dodo is up in Heaven somewhere bragging to his war buddies that we sent him off like the president.
May 1st: officially completed both my sociology and psychology minors today!
I’m majoring in interior design. This confuses a lot of people.
May 7th: power outage at Menards + nonfunctioning generators = 5 hours of doing all transactions by hand on pen and paper in the semi-dark
It was like working in the Stone Age.
May 15th: I just spent nearly 2 hours at the bookstore and walked out with one book of crossword puzzles.
If I wanted to read a book about vampires, though, the options were limitless.
May 17th: it takes a special kind of person to get their face stuck between the doors of a refrigerator...I am that person.
I don’t remember this. At all. Like not even a little bit.
May 23rd: in the last three weeks of work, I've had one single solitary day off that was hardly even a day off...I think I've well-earned a trip to Italy.
This is where the fun is about to begin.
May 25th: goodbye Bloomington, hello Rome!
Not so fast, we had to deplane right after leaving the gate due to a flat tire. You can read about that here.
May 27th: I've become that person that takes pictures of food.
And you can see those pictures in this post and this post where I dish out all my adventures in Italian cuisine. Haha…dish. See what I did there?
May 29th: I've tried writing this status 50 times and I just don't have words. To put it simply, Rome is amazing.
June 7th: spent the whole day in Ostia Antica, drawing in the blazing sun...to say I'm sunburnt would be a severe understatement.
I kind of went on a blogging sabbatical before I got around to documenting this part of my trip. Here are a couple pictures to show you what I saw. And my unusual sunburn.
June 10th: I guess I can now cross "Go to work jetlagged" off my bucket list.
I had to work less than 24 hours after my plane landed. I think I was slurring my words half way through my shift and customers thought I was drunk, so my manager sent me home early.
June 15th: the zoo never fails to turn me into a giddy, spastic child. — with Amanda Hill at Indianapolis Zoo and White River Gardens.
I may or may not have embarrassed my cousin by freaking out over the giraffes. If you didn’t know, I really love giraffes.
June 23rd: "I have the perfect concept for your new commercial...you build a house in the middle of Menards to show all the crap you can buy here! And then...then...you fill it with food because you've got that too! Like, this place could be a bomb shelter with the amount of stuff you guys have. This is where I'm hiding out when the zombies attack!!!!" - A Menards Guest
Unfortunately, I don’t think this concept could be accomplished with the handheld camera and $10 budget that Menards sets aside for their commercials.
July 9th: I came home to five packages on my doorstep! They were all textbooks…
July 13th: I posted this picture of the dog my parents rescued. I captioned it, “The creepiest creeper that ever creeped.”
July 28th: I’ve now watched the Opening Ceremonies three times, in full. I swear there is a reason behind this.
I recapped the Ceremony and lots of people liked it. It is now my most popular post. Read it here if you missed out the first time.
August 4th: I’ve got something for you! Here’s a blast from the past for my fellow Chicagolanders.
I was feeling nostalgic that day and posted this old car insurance commercial that I can’t believe I was able to find on YouTube.
August 10th: nothing quite says home like four crazy dogs that think they're starving.
Two of my dogs broke into the cabinets and stole a box of Truvia. I never would have known had they not left a trail.
August 20th: Why do the scissors I bought for school require scissors to get them out of the packaging?
Ah, the circle of life.
August 23rd: To the child that decided to bunny hop back and forth in front of my car for 5 minutes while I sat at a stop sign: I am not amused.
I am, unfortunately, above flattening small children to the pavement with my vehicle.
August 31st: Enough with the shootings already. Even before gun control, America seriously needs to gain a greater respect for humanity and a greater responsibility to each other.
I read somewhere that there have been 15 mass shootings in America this year. That is 15 too many.
September 5th: Lloyd, like llama, is such a funny name/word. What is with the redundant "L"?
While reading about Frank Lloyd Wright’s greatest works, this is the only thing I could think about.
September 9th: Favorite Childhood Quote: "I just got the new Lil Muffins book and it is ever so charming. Let us peruse it on the veranda." ... "I like pointy things."
This is taken from an episode of The Weekenders that I watched with my cousins one morning twelve or so years ago. It has stuck with us ever since and become somewhat of an inside joke. We recently found the clip on YouTube (starting at 2:49), and it was just about the most exciting thing ever.
September 14th: I am deeply troubled by how divided this country is, and the amount of hatred that is spewed left and right (no pun intended) is sometimes hard to digest. The bottom line is that we are all in this together. It's not Left or Right. It's not Black or White. Those things don't matter. What does matter is that our country is in trouble, and BOTH our Liberal and Conservative leaders put us here.
September 26th: so if this girl on X Factor doesn't want to be known as Gene Simmons's daughter, why did she show up in an Escalade, with her dad, and already wearing a mic pack? Curious...
I love how everyone on these singing reality shows has a story. I later commented that the X Factor managed to find all of America’s most talented homeless people.
October 4th: Watch Glee they said. It's a comedy they said.
Oh, the infamous break up episode…
October 13th: It’s a beautiful day to build a house!
October 14th: Menards Guest: "So, do you have your Halloween costume all picked out yet?" Me: "Oh, yes, I thought this year I'd dress up as a tired and overworked college student."
That costume took approximately 9 weeks to put together.
October 18th: The more I drive this loaner car, the less I want to give it back. Hatchbacks rock.
Hatchbacks speak for themselves.
October 24th: I don't know who you are, Kevin Krupa from Iowa, but I'm begging you to pay your damn bills. One more call from your debt collectors and I’ll be hunting your ass down.
Ever have your cell phone go off in class to the tune of Miley Cyrus’s Party in the U.S.A.? I have.
October 24th: It was a pumpkin carving kind of night!
November 6th: Romney is currently leading in Tippecanoe County. Further proof that Purdue is full of idiots.
That was the first time all election season that I made a statement regarding my political stance. It stands to be my biggest regret in life.
November 16th: just ordered a pizza and I ended the conversation with "love you, goodbye." never has the world heard such an awkward silence.
November 25th: Christmas decorating is in full swing. You didn’t think I was stopping after the tree did you?
I meant to share my Christmas tablescape after I did my annual tree post, but never got around to it (you’ll find out more about why shortly). Here’s some pictures of the sparkly goodness.
November 29th: Professor evaluations are my favorite way to vent out 16 weeks worth of frustration.
You lied, Stone. K201 was not K20-Fun.
December 3rd: I’m really getting somewhere with this paper…
December 5th: Four final projects/exams down, four more to go! The end is in sight!
Eight finals and three all-nighters in six days makes Krystal tired, cranky, and tired.
December 8th: This is where I had to start posting a series of updates for my family members and friends. My dad (my biological dad, not to be confused with my step-dad Papa Kevin), fell and hit his head on a concrete birdbath late on the night of December 7th. This resulted in a closed T-shaped skull fracture that ran from the base of his neck to the forehead, then down both sides to his ears. There was bleeding, severe damage to both frontal lobes (the doctor said it was equivalent to a lobotomy), and damage to both temporal lobes. When I arrived home after my last final the next day, he was still in a coma.
My dad was in the ICU for ten days where his condition continued to deteriorate: he stopped moving, was no longer responding to pain, the EEG showed slow brain activity, and his breathing was becoming increasingly more labored. He passed away peacefully on December 17, 2012, with his family close by.
The night of my father’s accident, it had been exactly one year since I had last seen or spoken to him. There were unresolved issues between the two of us that I wish there hadn’t have been. On the night that my family chose to have last rites administered, I told my dad that I loved him and that he was forgiven. I’m still not sure if he heard me, but part of me thinks he did. I hope he did.
December 16th: Hello, old friends. Oh, how I’ve missed you.
In the midst of a difficult time, it was nice to receive this news on my final semester grades. All my hours of hard work and sleep deprivation were worth it.
December 19th: Dancing to Gangnam Style with Jen at the funeral home. This may or may not be inappropriate.
One of my friends told me that my witty character and positive personality would be my strength for getting through this. She was right. My dad didn’t want a funeral service or people crying over him. He wanted a party. I’m not really sure Gangnam Style has anything to do with that, but it was fun.
December 22nd: I guess now is as good a time as any to start Christmas shopping.
It was a terrible time to start shopping. If you ever have the urge to go inside Hollister on December 22nd, don’t.
December 23rd: Today was filled with laughter, stories, and family togetherness. That is what Christmas is all about.
If you are ever playing The Game of Things and get the topic “things you shouldn’t name a children’s book,” I guarantee that “Big Tits Goes to the Park” will be a crowd favorite.
December 30th: Imagine the lines at Six Flags on a Saturday in July...now combine all of them and double it. You will come out with the approximate length of the Kohl's returns line.
One hour, twenty two minutes, and forty seven seconds. That’s how long I waited to return a shirt.
December 31st: Just got face masked at the CVS Minute Clinic. This is the exciting life I lead. Happy new year?
Yes, I am ringing in 2013 by lying in my bed, coughing up a lung, and writing this blog post. Exciting. And in case you’re wondering, I was diagnosed with allergies. My sore throat, chest pain, barking seal cough, and the rainbow of colors coming out of my nose are apparently the new symptoms for allergies. I should have gone to the doctor last week when my mom told me to. Mothers are always right.
In addition to resolving to listen to my mother more in 2013, I’m also resolving to become a more well-rounded person. I want to do more, give more, and be more. I want my résumé to say that I did more than just study while I was in college. I’ve taken the first few steps this past year by working and being more involved in student groups, but I also want to live. In a world of smartphones and social media, it is easy to feel connected to people while essentially living in isolation. The greatest lesson I have learned in 2012 is that life is too short. They are cliché words, but they are also true and shouldn’t be taken for granted.
The next greatest lesson I have learned in 2012 is to always tell the people you love that you love them because they might not always be around to hear it. I’ve grown up with a momma that always tells me that she loves me, but she is the only person in my life that does that. Now I end every phone call and visit to my family with a “love you, goodbye.” Be warned, though: it is a habit to use with caution. One day you might accidentally say those words to the pizza man.